drama resurfaces
06.28.2006 at 9:31 AM
Monday night got a phone call. Didn�t answer cause I recognized kelly�s #. He left a voicemail asking me to call.
Tuesday emailed him back with this:
In one of our conversations I asked you some questions about the
zodiac. Your answer to me was that if I really cared that I'd find
the information for myself. Well I did.
In another conversation, I was trying to explain some of myself to
you, I even told you about a book that would give you information on
understanding some of my thought-processes. I was trying to explain
to you that the book was to me the equivalent of what numerology and
the zodiac are to you. Not only did you immediately get defensive,
thinking that I was poking fun at your beliefs, but I bet you never
bothered to even look up that book I was talking about.
In your own words� if someone cares enough they will go find the
information for themselves.
Two months ago you were more than eager to tell how difficult and
confrontational I am, which if you had bothered to look for the
information I told you about, you would have seen that I wasn't trying
to be 'difficult' or 'confrontational', but actually trying to
understand you, something you apparently didn't feel compelled to do
in return.
Yes, there are things that pissed me off, but there is no sense in
going into those when I think the real problem is that you had no
desire to get to know who I really am. You said you did, you said you
were trying to 'break down walls', but when actually presented with
information you ignored it having already decided for yourself who I
was.
So why would I be eager to talk with someone who:
A) dislikes so many things about me?
B) didn't even try to understand me?
Got this response:
You asked about the zodiac because it pertained to your interest and had nothing to do with you being interested in my interest (numbers and astrology) it was a assignment for you and that was your concern, not what i thought.
You know i think your mad because you didnt get to kick me out again..to end it yourself. we both know that you would have ended it again, you always did. I remember you saying after some of the most wonderful lovemaking...though you dont call it that...it was just sex for you, I remember you asking me to leave and you stated that you had come to the conclusion, at that moment, that all we had was sex.
Well after making love to you, I saw what you meant. I just saw it for the first time. you said i didnt try to understand you but i KNEW you . I didnt have to read a book about you , you told me in the beginning that you can be difficult, you warned me instantly, you knew that you were a difficult person and you forewarned me because you figured it might not last, it was your way of saying "i warned you before hand, so dont be mad with me when i dump you."
I knew you more than you thought i did. I just didnt want to deal with those things with you. I wished we had stayed the way we were and you got in your moods and asked me to leave. i just couldnt see myself spending a lifetime with someone that reacted that way you did at time...How would I be able to write books or things if you werent interested in them...if you couldnt support me?
I didnt dislike things about you, i just hated to argue with you about them, and I totally understood you, thats why you let me in. I understood you completely.
Leave the door open for me tonight, I need to hold you.
I Emailed this back:
Please don't come over.
It is obvious to me that you really have no idea who I am, and have no desire to. You decided who you thought I was and you're sticking to that. It's fine, but I don't have to play into it.
He did not come over, but sent this:
well as of, you are always right about everything. well since you got this, you know i havent come. ciao.
There are so many facts he�s got wrong, things I want to correct him on, but it it really worth even bothering?
bEfOrE ~ AftEr
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