I'll pass....
08.01.2007 at 1:56 PM
Ok, so here�s where things stand with Mark: I don�t know. All of this is assumption because he doesn�t really SAY anything in a forward manner. I tried talking to him about how he confuses me; kisses me and gets close and then backs off and says things like he shouldn�t be touching me.
He keeps talking about how he hates to be alone, he�s always been in relationship after relationship and being single is not what he wants, and he goes on about how great I am and how attracted he is to me, but then he pulls away.
I think basically what is happening is that he likes the physical attraction we have and is totally ready to act on that, but knows that if I go down that road I expect to be exclusive. He hasn�t said so but my understanding is that he doesn�t want to be exclusive with me, which is why he backs off.
Which is fine, and I appreciate that he doesn�t force things, but it would have been much easier for me to figure this out if he�d just been blunt. Instead of saying that he didn�t want to be exclusive when I brought my confusion about his actions up he just said �I don�t want to do anything to make you mad at me�.
Ok, maybe I�m slow at deciphering, but I guess this means he wants to sleep with me but doesn�t want to date me, or exclusively at least. I mean, I�m not even important enough to him for him to tell his friends he�ll call them back when we are hanging out. That is a big unconscious sign right there. I mean, if he were interested he�d be, you know, interested!
He always says that he wants to hang out and be friends but we always come back to that attraction thing, and then he starts kissing me and then we are back to me being confused because he backs off. (ok it�s only happened twice but that�s enough for me to feel it�s a pattern) So I am just keeping my distance, not getting on messenger, not instigating communication. I see it as I confuse him and if I just stay away we will both move on and find what we want.
I�m not angry, just frustrated, more at myself I think for not being able to understand guy-speak better. But hey, at least I figured this one out quicker than usual and without getting myself hurt in the process. So hey, Mark, no hard feelings, but if I�m not a priority I�m gonna pass.
bEfOrE ~ AftEr
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